Satan Asks Democrats To Tone Down All The Evil

In the tradition of “something lite for the weekend,” here’s The Babylon Bee’s Satan asking Democrats to tone it down a notch:

“I love the homicidal thing that you got going on there. I really dig it. OK, but maybe market it just a little bit differently. Like the serial killer that everyone thinks is such a sweet guy. You know, he’s got 27 bodies in the basement, but he’s like, you know, coaching Little League. That’s what I want.”

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4 Responses to “Satan Asks Democrats To Tone Down All The Evil”

  1. Kirk says:

    I just wish that the Babylon Bee wasn’t actualizing all these things by writing them…

    Their writers seem to have a direct line to whatever/whoever is controlling our reality, and if they write it, it becomes truth. This concerns me, because if Satan does turn up in a meeting like this, or comes out as being behind it all with the Democrats, I’m not going to be able to maintain much of a “shocked face”.

    Frankly, I’m pretty sure that Satan and his minions are actually standing back in shock and dismay at the state of the world, today. Why? Because I doubt that they, in their worst efforts, would be unable to come up with some of this shit. They’re probably worried about their jobs…

    You can probably imagine the after-work “unhappy hours” they’re having: “Why? Why didn’t we think of that…!!?”

  2. John Fisher says:

    I’ve long thought that the Bee has access to an erratic time machine that lets them see glimpses of the future.

  3. Eric says:

    Satan is dreading the day the Hillarybeast croaks, because he knows within a week he will be suicided, and she’ll take over the place.

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