Posts Tagged ‘The Fat Electrician’

USS Texas: “The Most Gangsta Battleship Of All Time”

Saturday, February 10th, 2024

The Fat Electrician has a tribute video for USS Texas (which is still undergoing refurbishment).

  • “Today we’re talking about the most gangsta battleship of all time: The USS Texas, predating both World Wars, being built in 1914.”
  • “It’s commonly referred to as the last dreadnought. But it’s not technically a dreadnought, belonging to the New York-class of battleswhips, which were commonly referred to as super-dreadnoughts.” It was a class of two, with only the New York and the Texas. There was a pre-dreadnought USS Texas laid down in 1889 and scrapped in 1911.
  • “They had the largest guns ever put on a boat up to that time. That would be the Mark 1, capable of launching two 14 inch shells that weighed nearly 1,600 pounds apiece. The USS Texas had five of them, two in the front and three in the back. It was like a freedom sedan.”
  • They also had ballistic calculators and analogue computers, making them the most accurate naval guns in the world at the time. Plus a whole bunch of smaller guns.
  • “It was the first ship in history to incorporate anti-aircraft guns.”
  • “As well as having a 12″ thick hull, an entire freedom foot of Pittsburgh steel. The only thing millimeters is going to do to that is scratch the paint.”
  • It was the first ship to have a compliment of Marines onboard. “They let the water grunts drive the biggest gun ever made.”
  • The USS Texas saw “almost no combat” in World War I. Via Wikipedia: “Texas’s service with the Grand Fleet consisted entirely of convoy missions and occasional forays to reinforce the British squadron on blockade duty in the North Sea whenever German heavy units threatened.”
  • “But it’s actions in World War II made it a naval legend.” Lots of newer, more powerful ships than the Texas, but the Texas was the only battleship to engage the enemy in all five theaters.
  • “D-Day, June 6, 1944. The Texas would take it’s position 12,000 yards off the coast of Normandy.” It fired 235 rounds at German fortifications in just under 54 minutes. “That is four hundred and eight thousand pounds of ammunition.”
  • “The Texan was shooting the enemy with about three spicy Volvos a minute.”
  • “I’m trying to tell you the Grim Yeeter over here bitchslapped the enemy’s coastline with an entire car dealership in the amount of time it takes you to watch a TV show.”
  • Continued bombarding until running out of ammo June 11, at which point it went back for resupply. By the time it was back, allied troops had driven the enemy so far inland its guns couldn’t reach. So it moved in to 3,000 yards, the closest it could get without beaching the ship.
  • “It’s at that point the Texas said ‘Hold my beer’ and flooded all the blister tanks on the starboard side, tilting the entire boat, changing the angle of the guns, allowing them to reach further inland.”
  • “They gangster leaned a 32 thousand ton warship so they could continue to engage the enemy. This might be the most grunterrific moment in world history.”
  • “It’s not technically a war crime. Geneva didn’t even necessarily know that shit was a fucking option.”
  • The Texas would go on to fight at Okinawa and Iwo Jima.
  • More info at https://battleshiptexas.org/.

    VAMPIRE: America’s New Discount Technical Rocket System

    Saturday, December 10th, 2022

    Ever since the Toyota War, when Chad’s cheap, fast-moving force of Toyota-based technicals left $1.5 billion worth of Libyan Soviet equipment burning in the desert, it’s been obvious that such forces could be very cost-effective units in future conflicts. The furious rate of smart-munition depletion in the Russo-Ukrainian War also demonstrated the need for cheaper alternatives to Stinger and Javelin.

    Enter the VAMPIRE.

    L3Harris’ Vehicle-Agnostic Modular Palletized ISR Rocket Equipment (VAMPIRE) is a portable kit that can be installed on most vehicles with a cargo bed for launching of the advanced precision kill weapons system (APKWS) or other laser-guided munitions.

    This L3Harris suitcase-type APKWS launcher and designator kit provides a rapid solution for arming non-tactical vehicles (NTV) and a variety of tactical vehicles, while integrating components to customer-specific specifications. Our capability provides ground forces the ability to engage targets beyond the range of weapons normally carried by SOF and light forces.

    Modular and palletized, the VAMPIRE system offers a low-cost and effective weapon deployment solution.

    VAMPIRE FEATURES

  • Designed to complement the low-cost, low-signature and availability of common NTVs and fit in any pickup or vehicle with a cargo bed
  • Installation can be completed in approximately two hours by two people using common tools
  • Can be configured to meet customer-specific requirements
  • Everything is on the pallet. Power supply eliminates the need for a 24-volt alternator on the vehicle
  • The WESCAM MX-10™- RSTA independent stabilized sighting system provides ISR overmatch
  • Can be equipped with APKWS or other laser-guided munitions
  • The Fat Electrician (who you may remember from his Sky Warden video) has an amusing rundown:

    Takeaways:

  • “What is it it is literally a DIY kit that shows up on a pallet, and according
    to the brochure, two men in two hours can install it on any pickup truck, giving them what amounts to a miniature version of HIMARS.” More like a miniature MLRS.

  • “As of August 22nd 2022 America is going to start exporting these to countries that are allies or entities that have America’s interest in mind.”

  • “America’s been sending out a lot of Javelin and Stinger missiles lately, and
    those are really expensive, so we made this as a cheaper alternative, and I’m not gonna lie, it’s way fucking cooler.”

  • “It looks like they gave Xzibit a DOD contract for the deadliest episode of Pimp My Ride. He found out the DOD liked guns and he put the entire Second Amendment in the bed of the pickup.”
  • “I keep saying any pickup truck. We all know I’m talking about Toyota…that is the official truck of guerrilla warfare.”
  • “This thing can shoot four Hydra 70 rockets. Now the reason they chose Hydra 70 rockets is because they’re probably the cheapest munition that America uses” at $2,799 a pop. Hydra 70 tops out at around 17 pounds, though most commonly around 10 pounds, so they’re not going to have the kinetic penetrating power of a 120mm APFSDS round to take out a tank, but are probably sufficient to take out a lot of other targets.
  • “The downside of that being they’re considered a dumb munition because you can’t actually guide them…However, the Hydra rockets being used with the VAMPIRE system are going to be equipped with a retrofit guidance module which is going to allow the Rockets to be laser guided.”
  • Unit cost with the guidance system is about $22,000, which makes it an order of magnitude less expensive than Javelin or Stinger.
  • So a soldier can “pull up to the side of the battlefield, throw up his Periscope launch four missiles, and take back off all without even getting out of the air conditioning of the cab because he can do it from the computer in the dash.”
  • Can also take out drones.
  • “In conclusion, I’m sure we’re gonna start seeing these in the news a lot more and, it’s probably only a matter of time until some crazy fucker from Texas or Florida acquires one of these mounted on the back of their El Camino, and then uses it to go hunt hogs or iguanas. And that’s the news article I’m looking forward to.”
  • When Russia bogged down trying to take Kiev, I thought that a raiding force of 100 or so technicals would be perfect to destroy those long lines of trucks (assuming they could be equipped with wheels wide enough to make it across the infamous rasputitsa mud). A system like VAMPIRE, with an ability to take out both light armored vehicles and helicopters, moves us significantly closer to making such a force a lot more practical.

    The Sky Warden: “An Up-Armored Crop Duster With Rocket Launchers”

    Saturday, November 19th, 2022

    At first, I was not at all enthused about the Air Force’s new Sky Warden platform, a step back to a single-seat, propeller-driven combat aircraft not used since the Douglas A-1 Skyraider was retired in 1973. Some background:

    U.S. Special Operations Command on Monday announced it has selected the AT-802U Sky Warden, made by L3Harris Technologies and Air Tractor, for its Armed Overwatch program.

    The indefinite delivery, indefinite quantity contract will be worth up to $3 billion, L3Harris said in a release Monday. The initial program contract award is for $170 million.

    Air Tractor is an aircraft manufacturer from Olney, Texas, that typically makes firefighting aircraft and agricultural planes such as crop dusters.

    Initial production of the Sky Warden will take place at Air Tractor’s facility in Olney. L3Harris will then modify those planes into the Armed Overwatch mission configuration at its Tulsa, Oklahoma modification center, beginning in 2023. L3Harris said work will also take place at its other sites in Greenville, Rockwall and Waco, Texas and Nashville, Tennessee.

    Air Force Special Operations Command’s Armed Overwatch program aims to build a fleet of up to 75 flexible, fixed-wing aircraft suitable for deployment to austere locations, with little logistical tail needed to keep them operating.

    SOCOM is planning for the single-engine Sky Warden, as AFSOC’s Armed Overwatch plane, to be able to provide close air support, precision strike and armed intelligence, surveillance and reconnaissance missions for counterterrorism operations and irregular warfare.

    When I heard that the Air Force was considering going back to a prop plane for a ground attack aircraft, I thought that: A.) This was a sign of their continuing disdain for the A-10, and B.) This was a role better suited for drones that manned aircraft, and thus the Air Force wanted it only to keep their institutional budget up, since anyone can fly a drone.

    However, if it’s specifically geared toward supporting special forces operations, then the move makes a lot more sense. In that case, you need the hyper-loiter capabilities, and larger drones can be of limited use if you’re out of line-of-radio-control (say, in mountainous terrain) and you don’t have them set up for satellite relay.

    Here’s a YouTuber who’s quite enthusiastic about it:

  • “That is an up-armored crop duster with rocket launchers on it. It looks like somebody maxed out the starter item in a video game.”
  • “It’s got bulletproof windows, a heavily armored cabin engine compartment, self-healing fuel lines [and] reinforced landing gear allowing you to land virtually anywhere. And it absolutely packed with ISR [intelligence surveillance and reconnaissance] equipment, [basically] making this a spy plane.”
  • “The standard payload is currently set to be 14 APK WS laser-guided Hydra rockets.”
  • “It’s basically an acoustic version of an F-22.”
  • It can loiter about 6 hours, as opposed to 1.5 hours for the A-10.
  • It’s also cheaper: “For every hour the A10 is in the air, there’s $20,000 in maintenance to be done. Compare that to the Sky Warden, which is less than $1,000 per flight.”
  • “Nobody wants to be the guy getting murked by a plane with a propeller in 2022. If you wake up dead, and you got to explain to all your buddies in the afterlife you got taken out by an A-10 Warthog, that’s respectable. You tell them you got taken out by a crop duster, they’re gonna talk shit for the rest of Eternity. ‘Hey guys, you hear that Groot over here got taken out by the fucking Wright Brothers.'”
  • The Pentagon is spending $3 million for the program, which is a lot of cheddar by normal people standards, but nothing by Pentagon standards. Being the biggest and baddest on the bloc means you can buy niche role weapons like this.

    While it remains to be seen if this is effective in modern combat, it’s hardly the first time the U.S. military has done this. In World War II, spotter pilot Charles Carpenter put bazookas on his Piper Cub and successfully took out panzers.

    (Trivia: The last P-51 used by the U.S. military was actually used by the army as a chase aircraft for helicopters in 1968.)